Keeping It Real: 9 Steps to Build Donor Trust When Things Don’t Go as Planned

Imagine this: a donor calls you, confused by a recent pledge reminder. As they describe what’s in front of them, you feel a pit in your stomach. You quickly realize they received another donor’s letter. Cue the panic, but honestly, what you do next is what really counts!  

There are two things that are certain in life as well as our Donor Relations work—challenges will arise, and mistakes will happen. Yet how we respond to those issues is what matters most. Donors can’t expect perfection, but they do (and should!) expect honesty, clarity, and accountability. When you handle challenges well, you can not only preserve the relationship but also strengthen it. That is why having a clear, thoughtful approach to donor communication during difficult moments is one of the most essential skills you can master in our profession.

Over the years, I have encountered my share of challenges, including mix-ups with pledge letters and many more. Some of those missteps were mine or my team’s to own, while others stemmed from organizational policies or unexpected events out of my control. Either way, it was still on me to make it right and rebuild trust with the donor.

When something goes wrong, the pressure is real. However, in those moments, having a thoughtful strategy in place can help you respond confidently and sincerely, rather than in a state of panic. Here are nine steps I recommend for resolving issues and rebuilding donor confidence.

9 Steps to Build Donor Trust

1. Identify the Issue – Understand exactly what went wrong and why. Was it a breakdown due to something within your control? Or is it tied to broader organizational policies or decisions? Clarifying the source of the issue will help you choose the best path forward.
   

2. Develop Solutions – Create clear, actionable fixes to resolve the immediate issue and prevent it from happening again. This step equips you to move quickly and communicate next steps confidently with internal partners and donors.
   

3. Manage Up – Quickly inform leadership and gift officers about the issue and how you plan to resolve it. Invite their input for the best path forward with the donor(s). These partners will appreciate your transparency, initiative, and willingness to take ownership. I know this step can feel uncomfortable, but it is essential to building internal trust and donor confidence.
   

4. Put the Plan Into Action – Prioritize fixing the issue above everything else. You may need to pause other projects so you can act quickly and follow through on your plan. In time-sensitive cases, like the misdirected pledge reminder, swift action can help you get ahead of the problem, prevent further impact, and reassure other donors.
   

5. Partner with Your Communications Experts – If the situation calls for broader outreach or more sensitive, personalized messaging, loop in your communications team early. Start with a thoughtful draft from a Donor Relations perspective, then invite Communications feedback to strengthen tone, clarity, and alignment. This collaboration helps ensure your message is both empathetic and effective.
   

6. Communicate with the Donor – Own the mistake and clearly explain what happened. Even if the donor is frustrated, your honesty and transparency will go a long way in alleviating their concerns. Share both what went wrong and the steps you are taking to make it right and prevent it from happening again. This step is your first opportunity to rebuild trust and strengthen the relationship.
   

7. Document and Share Preventative Measures – Outline any new processes and safeguards that need to be put in place. Work with internal partners to ensure systems, reports, and workflows are updated as needed. Communicate these changes clearly so your team understands the fix and the expectations moving forward. This will ensure you turn the mistake into a lesson, not a habit.
   

8. Share the Outcome – Once you have connected with the donor and implemented the necessary fixes, follow up with your leadership and the gift officer. This closes the loop, keeps your key partners informed, and reinforces your role as a proactive, communicative leader who takes ownership and delivers results.
   

9. Invite Donor Feedback – One of the best ways to build trust and engagement is to bring donors behind the curtain. Once your new processes are in place, follow up to share how the issue was resolved and invite their input on how the process could be improved. When it makes sense, you can include them in a focus group or feedback session to help shape future Donor Relations practices at your organization.

There are a few other key principles that ensure you effectively navigate a challenge in addition to the nine steps above.

Tone and Timing

What you say is important, yet how and when you say it can matter even more. Transparency does not mean rushing to communicate before you are ready. Do not lose your sense of urgency, but take time to gather facts. Extended silence can cause donors to worry, second-guess, or lose confidence in your organization’s ability to respond.

And when you do communicate, do so with humility and a clear commitment to making things right. Your tone should be calm, sincere, and donor-centered. In many cases, how you communicate does just as much to preserve trust as the actual solution itself.

Relationships Are Built Before the Apology

Trust is earned over time. When donors feel valued and informed on a consistent basis, not just when there is a problem, they are far more likely to respond with grace when things go sideways. Strong Donor Relations practices are more than thank-you notes, impact reports, and events. Strong practices foster genuine relationships where donors feel seen, heard, and connected. These are the relational pillars that will allow you to weather any storm.

Build a Culture Where Mistakes Are Accepted

As a leader, I’ve learned the importance of creating a culture where team members feel safe raising concerns and owning mistakes. The way your team talks about errors internally directly shapes how well you respond externally. Encourage accountability without blame—this creates space for quick course corrections and transparent communication with donors. When people fear finger-pointing, they’re more likely to delay or hide issues, which only makes things worse.

Mistakes don’t have to break our donor relationships. In fact, every challenge is an opportunity to demonstrate to donors just how much we value them. With the right approach, even tough moments can strengthen connection and reaffirm our commitment. The key isn’t just fixing the problem, but showing our donors that we are genuine in our desire to  get it right. That is what builds lasting trust and loyalty.

Written by Stacey Halphen